Maybe my mom is right....maybe not

I haven't lived without being loved by a significant other for about...almost 4 years. Maybe I should try it. Experience feeling totally alone in this world. I mean I'm as close as I've ever been. I have no friends anymore. Severed ties because of lies and mistakes and regrets. Putting one thing before another where it shouldn't be. Maybe I won't appreciate my own life until I look at it exclusive of anyone else.

I feel like she's wrong though. I try to honor her like the commandments say to by listening to her...but there's this strong feeling I keep getting that, for once, maybe she is wrong.

Anyways. I had a dream two nights ago.

So it was my wedding day and everyone was getting me ready. People were running around getting decorations taken care of, doing my hair, makeup, fixing my dress, etc. When I was finished getting ready, I walked out into this waiting area that looked almost exactly like Alana's reception place (they went to these Estates on the North Shore). The room was so pretty, everything was made of beautifully refinished Koa wood and etched glass designs. As I looked into the mirror, I saw my reflection very clearly. I don't say this often - if ever - but...I looked absolutely beautiful. My long hair was down and fell nicely on my body with light curls on the ends (ever since I was little, I wanted hair like this). My modest, pure white wedding dress was perfect. I was ready to go into the sealing room of the temple, but had to wait. There was another couple getting sealed before me. As things finally settled down and I realized what was to take place and the new covenants I would be making, I smiled so hard and I felt butterflies in my tummy. Seriously, I felt butterflies even in my dream! That was a first. Everything felt so real. And then I noticed...where was the groom? He wasn't there! Josh wasn't there. Yes, Josh was the groom. He couldn't come yet because...he was still on his mission! My wedding planner finally announced to everyone, "Thanks for coming to this wedding rehearsal!! Be sure to come to the real wedding which will take place on April 24, 2011!" I was devastated...it was only my rehearsal?! I started crying because I wanted so badly to marry him now...and because I got all dressed up for nothing! And that's when I woke up because my mom sent me a text message and I felt my phone buzzing.

Does anyone else think it's weird that she wakes up before I do, and she's 3 hours behind?