Finally in the Mission Field.

Josh left for the mish field on Wednesday, February 4 at about 9:55 AM. I was an emotional wreck the day before when I told him goodbye, but like always, God blessed me with amazing friends and family who have been my support from the very beginning. How I would survive without any of them, I don't even know! Jaso has been supporting me. Phill talked to me on the phone when I was balling my eyes out. I wanted to call Jaso but I didn't want to bother her and wake her up with my stupid emo-ness. :/ It would've been 6 am Hawaii time. And then I got text messages and emails from Josh's mom that were so sweet and comforting. Gosh, she's the nicest kindest purest heartest little Asian lady I know, and I can't wait for her to be my mother-in-law! Haha.

I know I'm not supposed to be counting. But he's been out 80 days now. Honestly, it's still going by slowly but I feel relieved that he's finally gone from the MTC. No more pain with the knowledge that he's so close to me yet so far. I don't have to see him and wish I could say goodbye with more than just a handshake or a "missionary hug". When he was on the plane going to Florida, I thought...the next time he'll be on a plane is when he's coming home. :) I cried so much the day I said goodbye because he told me "I love you" for the first time in two months. So he's sacrificing a lot to put the Lord first in EVERYTHING that he does. He asked me to only write once a month because he said he's been thinking about me to much and letting me distract him. He said that I wasn't necessarily doing anything to distract him but just the fact that he loved me and stuff distracted him. Oh my gosh, which reminds me. He had a dream that I died! I can't believe I completely forgot that, I mean it was the reason for him making the decisions he did (like me only writing once a month). He woke up and he really thought it happened and was very depressed. And then he thought, if something did happen on his mission (HEAVEN FORBID!!), would he be able to handle it with just his relationship with the Lord? So, I guess he's trying to strengthen his relationship with God even more by focusing on Him more than on me. I commend him for all he's done, it just hurts sometimes. I miss him. :/

He amazes me more and more every single day. I told my mom, "I feel sooo lucky that Josh chose me."

Her answer: "You are. He's great. Be worthy of him."

That's my motivation for the next two years.